May is the month of new beginnings.
But sometimes it is not.
A university degree, four books, and hundreds of articles and I still make mistakes when reading. You write "good morning" and I read it as, "I love you".
- Mahmoud Darwish
وجَلس حزنِي تِجاهي تأملني قليلآ، ثم أجهش الحزن بالبكاء ، وبَقيت صامتة
And my sorrow sat next to me, stared at me for a while,then it burst into tears and I remained silent.
-Ghada el-Samman
May is the month of new beginnings.
But sometimes it is not.
When I saw her face I decided I wanted to live. I decided to live forever just in case she ever woke up.
I am so breathtakingly lonely. But I can’t tell my friends that because I don’t want them to feel bad.
But
It’s just lonely without a family.
Without a home you can go back to, when everything falls apart.
I can't live as I once did, telling people that I was doing fine and desperately wanting them to wade through the language and see that I was in pain.
Hanif Abdurraqib, A Little Devil in America: Notes in Praise of Black Performance
YOU’RE A MONSTER, BUT SO AM I
elektra - sophocles, transl. by anne carson / the overture to tannhäuser - paul cézanne / letter to my rage: an evolution - lidia yuknavitch / elektra - sophocles, transl. by anne carson / easier than lying - halsey / incendies - wajdi mouawad / edit by darkrume / ‘things you wanted to say but never did’ project - geloy concepcion / enough - suzanne buffam / the witch doesn’t burn in this one - amanda lovelace / höstsonaten (autumn sonata, 1978) - dir. ingmar bergman / wildflower wildfire - lana del rey / softer, softest - hole / asoftwrongness / crazed - katherine quinn / feuchtgebiete (wetlands, 2013) - dir. david wnendt / on earth we’re briefly gorgeous - ocean vuong